“Grand marriage then is set apart by the rareness of it. The wise husband and wife who respect and protect their singular connection ironically exhibit it to the entire world. Everyone can sense their confederacy and are blessed by it, but no one will ever see inside the private guild, the secret society, or the castle on the hill, because of the couple’s commitment to exclusivity.” ~ Wife for Life: The Power to Succeed in Marriage

Got up before Honey. Tried not to wake him. As soon as he did wake up he came into my office where I was working. I wrapped my arms around him from my office chair, telling him he’s never more sexy than first thing in the morning. He made us breakfast: spinach omelets and sour dough toast. We went into our back-to-back offices for virtual meetings. Mid-morning, we cleaned the kitchen together, including the refrigerator drawer full over overripe vegetables. Bonus chores: he cleaned the kitty litter box while I shined the stove. Packed up and went out to run errands: Home Depot for a new bathroom faucet, Costco for TP, paper towels, and detergent. Wendy’s salads for lunch. Headed for the mall to straighten out a JC Penny purchase, then realized the grandkids have outgrown their shoes. Wandered down to Payless where together, we we picked 4 pairs of adorable footwear. Drove straight to the kids’ house where the shoes proved a big hit, and where we delivered a couple of loads of clean towels I’d done for my pregnant daughter-in-law. Enjoyed a very pleasant visit with the entire household for thirty minutes and came away with two outstanding pieces of personalized crayon art. Drove down the street to drop in on our other family: a very pregnant daughter and her husband. (We came bearing Costco peaches–her favorite–only to find identical peaches ripening in their window sill already. Now we have too many peaches.) Got to ooo and ahhh over all the baby equipment in the waiting, and encourage our son-in-law in his work, and make jokes about seeing them at the hospital later in the day. Drove the ten minutes home and unloaded the car. I napped on the couch while Honey caught up on the news. Hungry again. We worked in the kitchen together: he made dinner (the best), while I did laundry. We talked about the presidential race and watched a bit of an HBO documentary as we ate. After dessert (strawberries–watching our weight together) I shooed him out to put his feet up while I cleaned up the dinner dishes. He didn’t put his feet up. He went to work installing the new air conditioner for our bedroom and he put in the new bathroom faucet, while I did two more loads of laundry, swept the kitchen, and vacuumed the living room. Honey popped into the kitchen just in time to put new skid protectors on the kitchen chairs I’d overturned for the purpose. Now it was time to retreat to our upstairs sanctuary. Like every night (that he’s not traveling on business), we spent a few minutes in our offices, wrapping up our work, then we talked and cuddled and prayed together, then kissed good night. I  fell asleep reading my book about James Madison, while he fell asleep flipping between the Olympics and the Food Channel.

Next week we’ll be neck-deep changing the world, but this day was about our world, and in our one ordinary day, we managed to reminisce several times, disagree at least twice, laugh repeatedly for no reason worth remembering, hold hands at every opportunity, and worry over virtually every member of our family. That’s my real life Wife-for-Life and I LOVE it.

“We seem to have a deep life together apart from all other people on earth, and which we cannot show, explain or impart to them. At least my affection seems to isolate me in the deepest moments from all others, and it makes me speak with my whole heart and soul to you and you only. And perhaps this isolation is one reason why deep love makes one feel—at least in some moments—so religious.” Walter Bagehot, mid-nineteenth century English economist and journalist, to his wife, Eliza, Love Letters, p. 23.


You have the power to turn ordinary days into an extraordinary marriage.
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powerwebinarsidebar“I cannot believe how many points you made that helped me in such a short time! I can’t wait to see my husband tonight, and it’s been a long time since I’ve felt that way. I know I will see him with new eyes!”

Ramona Zabriskie on Email
Ramona Zabriskie
Ramona Zabriskie, a wife of 38 years, is the multi-award winning author of Wife for Life: The Power to Succeed in Marriage and founder of the highly acclaimed Wife for Life University, a one-of-a-kind virtual school for wives that transforms marriages through a step-by-step, principle-based approach via live mentoring, classes, and community. Get Ramona’s free information-packed video lesson and assessment, Marriage Markers.

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